I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
