Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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