I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
So vagazzling was a success
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