her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
