What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
