Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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