I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Randomize