i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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