Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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