i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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