If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
