Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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