shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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