its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
