The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize