he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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