He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
