420 ftw
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize