I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
This is not my ceiling
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
