Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I enjoy the company of your penis
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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