I can't watch pbs sober anymore
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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