I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
