**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Then you guys just all showered together...?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize