she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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