Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
