i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You may now shotgun with the bride
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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