Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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