Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
