ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
