went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
