sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
