Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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