I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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