My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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