So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
