I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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