HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
