discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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