The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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