If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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