We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just gift wrapped bread.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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