Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
