I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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