At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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