**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
