so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
