I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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