What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize