I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
