i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
